Thursday, November 28, 2013

Happy, umm, Th*nksg*v*ng

[Update November 2014]  Since people are still viewing this old post, it’s best to update.  BLUF:  Stand down.  There seem to be few or no mainstream attacks against Thanksgiving  this year.  Go figure.  In fact, the principle MSM article that came to our notice, was the spread of Thanksgiving paraphernalia to the land of our former colonial masters, England.
For this, as for so much else,  
we give thanks.

~ Original Post, 2013 ~

First Columbus Day.    And now -- what -- is Thanksgiving too  now Politically-Incorrect?

How to talk to your children about Thanksgiving's ugly history,0,1226806.story

(One strains to imagine the nationwide epidemic of family dramas that presumably led to that post. Little Susie, a teardrop suspended from her button-nose:  “M-m-mommy … This turkey t-tastes like genocide …”)
A reader retorts:

Thanksgiving Day is about neither history nor patriotism -- nor is it about Indians -- it's a day we set aside to give thanks -- to God or our families or fortune -- for what we have, as much or as little as it may be.  Period.
It's rather pitiful that a petty little prig chooses to dwell not on thanks but on resentment, though it's no surprise that a pompous mediocrity like The Times chooses to publish her.

[Update] No worries -- The politically correct term this year is “Thanksgivukkah

That chimeric coinage “Thanksgivukkah”  rivals that of Gröfaz for sheer phonetic grotesquerie.  It looks as though it should rhyme with “F*ck ya” (which is indeed the message to those whose ancestors founded this nation), but presumably some other pronunciation is intended.

Note:  This newly-minted wordoid “Thanksgivukkah” is something of a lexicological mayfly, not expected to see long wear:  Hanukkah and Thanksgiving are not expected to coincide again  for over seventy thousand years …

Oof, and now this:

[Flash update!]  Our crack research team here at WDJ Worldwide Enterprises ® (Headquarters:  Geneva) has dug into the matter and uncovered the real reason for the previously unexplained preference for white meat.  The answer might surprise you!  It has to do with the game of chess.  Here, the White pieces get the first move, which gives them a slight advantage over Black.   This explains the otherwise puzzling preference for tender turkey breast over the dried-out, tough and sinewy drumsticks.

Our Thanksgiving-related woes have been noted abroad.  Here, in Switzerland:
Fest unter Druck
Falls Sie im Doktor-Justiz-Sammelsurium
weiterblättern möchten,
Bitte hier klicken:


[After-thought]  If the apostles of goodthink (what the French these days call bisounours) imagine that, by posting such an edgy op-ed as their corporate contribution to the holiday spirit, they are bringing us all together for a thoughtful dialogue, followed by singing kumbaya around the fireside and sewing-circle, they are -- simply as an empirical matter -- sadly deluded.   The dissenting reader’s-comment with which we opened this post, is actually relatively measured;  more typical are such testy replies as the following:

The accepted narrative for Native Americans is they were all playing Ring Around the Rosie until we blew germs on them and they all fell down. Though he had a helluva time getting it published, Lawrence H. Keeley’s War Before Civilization debunks that myth. The book describes common traditions such as mutilating a body AFTER it was killed to ensure the victim was doomed in the afterlife. We learn of mass graves with hundreds of scalped cadavers a good half-century before Columbus got there. Indian traditions have many wonderful traits, but let’s grow up a little and allow for the possibility they were simply incompatible with the modern world. For Christ’s sake, when we got here they hadn’t even invented the wheel.

Happy Thanksgivukkah

countered (from the opposing wing, the Atavist camp) by such blasts as

The so-called Thanksgiving story imparted to most American schoolchildren is a triumphalist, sectionalist Yankee national origin myth.

Although the on-the-air-heads in the Fluff Room (which has replaced the Newsroom at many media) cannot perceive it, posting a piece like that at a sensitive time like a solemn national holiday, makes as much sense as putting up Dylan’s “Masters of War” to mark Veteran’s Day, or a historical account of the doctrine of Jewish blood-guilt for Yom Kippur.
~     ~     ~

Other holiday-related posts:
   * Veterans Day
   * Hallowe’en
   * Christmas
For a selection of individual detective stories,
available for your Nook or Kindle,
visit this site:


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