Showing posts with label capybara. Show all posts
Showing posts with label capybara. Show all posts

Wednesday, May 30, 2012

Voters are Demanding Answers


* By this point  it is pretty much universally acknowledged, by men and women of good sense, that Mitt “Mitt” Romney is actually Black.  (WDJ was the first to break this story;  we proved these startling assertions here.)
But what voters want to know is:    Why do you not more publically celebrate your African heritage,  hmm, Guv’nor?

* The press has been notably reticient about probing into the dark corners of the former moderate’s love-life.  But voters want to know:   Just what were you doing in that motel room with the capybara, hmm, Guv’nor??

* Some guy on the Internet  claims you’re a Space Alien.  Now what do you say to that, hmm, Guv’nor ??!??!


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~ Commercial break ~
We now return you to your regularly scheduled essay.

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[Linguistic note:  We are not here using the term “Guv’nor” with any reference to Mr Romney’s previous employment in the State of Massachusetts.  Rather, we are using it in the Cockney sense, just to be snarky.]

Sunday, March 25, 2012

Abdelkader Merah a été mis en examen pour complicité d'assassinats et écroué


Late-breaking details here:



Tie-in if any   to the Riemann Conspiracy   has not been determined  at press time.

[Update 28 Dec 2012]  A retrospective, along with audio of Merah himself:

http://www.lefigaro.fr/actualite-france/2012/12/26/01016-20121226ARTFIG00311-le-figaro-rembobine-2012-la-croisade-terroriste-de-merah.php?m_i=q5tqXlHczEQ3k4R1bBpGRMkJMVnSi8n8hfUGxRalW5V_0KmWk
 

Thursday, January 19, 2012

Internet Boycott Rages On !


Dateline, the Bat-Cave, inner sanctum of the Elders of WDJ. --
In an unprecedented move, the World of Doctor Justice is extending its Web blackout for a second straight day, in protest of … what was it now … oh yes, -- user-hostile plastic packaging that can only be separating with a blasting torch, in the process creating sharp edges that can slice your fingers off.   In thus outdoing even Wikipedia, Dr Justice has clearly demonstrated his commitment to … stuff.

Furthermore, the site has upped the ante.  In addition to resolutely refusing to publish anything ludic, comedic, risible, rib-tickling, side-splitting, kneeslap-inducing  or ROFL-level material, the site is now threatening to publish jokes minus the punchline.  There is therefore now unbearable pressure on Congress to do … stuff.

=>  A priest, a rabbi, and a capybara  walk into a bar.
The priest orders a dry martini;  the rabbi orders a wet one; and the capybara orders swill.
The bartender says, “I’m sorry, we don’t --“

So, what did the bartender say, hm, huh?  Wouldn’t you just like to know!

Thursday, January 5, 2012

Feds Unmask Capybara Terror Plot !


Villagers Riot in Response

Sordid details here:
http://uncyclopedia.wikia.com/wiki/Capybara_Bomb

Capybara wearing a suicide vest



For more lore  anent these large but lovable rodents, which make the perfect pet, bunkmate, and general friend-substitute,  click here:

Monday, December 5, 2011

Capybaras Rally in Times Square over Latest DSK Outrage


Is no-one safe from his roving gaze?”  they cry.

Thursday, December 1, 2011

DSK Caught in Bed with Undocumented Capybara !!!


Well, not yet;  but nothing would surprise us at this point. 
“The giant rodent looked at me funny,” said the distinguished economist in his own defense.

Anyhow, now it’s not just an article in the New York Review of Books, which we commented on earlier; now it’s an entire book, Affaires DSK, la contre-enquête, by Michel Taubmann, which appeared today.  You can read excerpts in Paris-Match, and summaries here:



Once again, the American MSM is so far mute on all this.   Which is why we’re posting --  The World of Dr Justice -- Your one-stop shopping for all DSK and capybara news !

~  Bonus Fun-Pack ~

And, for those of you with a truly insatiable appetite for this sort of thing, here is the initial paragraph of a  slightly earlier news-item (no overt references to hamsters or other rodents;  you have to kind of read between the lines), along with a choice selection of tart commentaries from Le Figaro’s reliable readers, for the benefit of students of French.



Affaire DSK : la passagère d'une berline recherchée
Une autre femme est recherchée par les avocats de Nafissatou Diallo. Dans la nuit du 13 au 14 mai, elle a été vue en compagnie de Dominique Strauss-Kahn à Manhattan. Selon Me Douglas Wigdor, elle apparaît sur les images des caméras de surveillance de l'hôtel vers une heure du matin. «On distingue d'abord une voiture, genre berline, qui s'arrête devant l'entrée de l'hôtel. DSK en descend le premier. Puis, après vingt, trente secondes, une femme sort à son tour. Blonde, la quarantaine, mince. DSK entre dans le lobby. Elle attend un peu puis suit le même chemin. Elle n'est pas à ses côtés lorsqu'il s'arrête au comptoir de la réception, mais ils prennent ensuite l'ascenseur», indique l'avocat, qui estime que le couple «voulait donner l'impression de ne pas être ensemble». Il n'y a pas de caméra au 28e étage où se trouve la suite 2806. Aux alentours de 3 heures du matin, selon la vidéo, la même femme quitte l'hôtel. Le procureur Cyrus Vance avait cherché à entrer en contact avec ce témoin qui avait refusé de donner suite.
Des informations, non confirmées, ont fait état d'une deuxième visite féminine cette nuit-là. Deux employées du Sofitel ont, elles, raconté à leur hiérarchie qu'elles avaient fait l'objet d'une «drague lourde» de la part du patron du FMI lors de son arrivée le vendredi. Ce dernier leur aurait proposé avec insistance de boire une coupe de champagne après leur service.

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[Commentaires]
Blonde, la quarantaine....Marine?
--
Ils ont joué aux dominos sur Blackberry entre 1h et 3h du matin. Ou est le problème ?
---
DSK ne faisait sans doute bien des jaloux. Plein aux as, bien entoure. Tous les fustres de la planete qui bossent 14 h par jour et se defoncent avec de l'alcool frelate en regardant des pornos ont une dent contre ce Rabelaisien hors du commun.
---
ras le bol de DSK et de son affaire à la noix !
----
Bof......
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La constante de cette affaire à rebondissements multiples c'est que le lectorat du Figaro se délecte d'histoires de bidet.
-
y compris les commentateurs, donc acte !
---
Peu importe le cas particulier de DSK.
Mais qu'en 2011 on puisse encore embastiller à première demande, sans aucune preuve, n'importe quel quidam, voila qui devrait vous poser davantage de problèmes.
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En tant que directeur du FMI , dont le siège se situe à Washington , capitale fédérale et non lupanar pour les mal-entendants , il ne devait certainement pas ignorer un fait législatif organique très important dans ce tout petit pays : la prostitution est interdite sous toutes ses formes aux Etats-Unis ( c'est un pays prohibitionniste !!!!!! ) , et même les clients peuvent y être condamnés très lourdement .
A mon avis , les Américains ne vont pas laisser passer tout ça .
C'est quand même du global-gravoss , non ?
Eux , dont les connaissances linguistiques et culturelles ne sont pas forcément celles de l'ignorance crasse dont on essaie en vain de les affubler , doivent certainement apprécier l'épithète élégant " inapproprié " , balbutié à la télé , à sa juste valeur , le ruminer tranquilloss dans leurs officines , et ce pour l'avenir de la procédure qu'ils sont en droit justement d'exiger puisqu'ils sont en fait chez eux , et qu'ils vont se charger de mettre en route sans le moindre regret , ni a priori .
Bonjour les dégâts !!!!!!
Quelle misère !
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Ca va durer encore longtemps, cette couverture hystérique d'un fait divers minable ? Que nous importe les élucubration de l'avocat de Dialo. Visiblement, il n'a que ça à faire
--
Ce n'est pas nouveau , il y a eu toujours des hommes à femmes et des femmes croqueuses d'hommes surtout dans la tres haute sphère.
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Quelle santé ce DSK!!!
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Question productivité sexuelle ,DSK dame le pion aux meilleurs spécimen du genre,la référence!!!
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J'ai mal à mon Figaro !!!
Electeur de droite, Sarkoziste, lecteur assidu du Figaro...
Je suis atterré du déballage de caniveau par mon journal préféré du cas DSK !!!
DSK n'est plus candidat potentiel ou supputatif, il n'a plus de visibilité politique, il n'a aucun mandat public et n'est plus en responsabilité.
A chaque fois la justice le disculpe. Le Figaro remplacerait les tribunaux ? Tous ses actes relèvent de sa vie privée. Sommes nous plus exemplaire ? De quel droit va t'on fouiller dans les caleçons de DSK ? LAMENTABLE !
Avec cet acharnement médiatique, un banal fait divers deviendra piège ou complot politique...
Faisons gaffe et faisons preuve de retenue, car je ne vois rien d'informatif dans tout ça...
Ma droite est bête.
---
Et si on (les journalistes) arrêtait de nous bassiner avec DSK, car dans la plus grande majorité, on s'en fiche de ce qu'il a fait ou pas !
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[Update 5 Dec 2011]  Further shocking developments here.


Tuesday, November 29, 2011

A Zoögraphy of WDJ


    BENEDICITE, omnes bestiae et pecora

Many of you may have wondered -- What’s with all the animals already ? ! ?  Cantor, topology, passe encore;  but like -- penguins?  freakin’ woodchucks?? -- What’s up with that?

Hey it’s the same at work.  I spend my days at a cluttered desk in a tiny pod, Saving American Lives (yeh okay occasionally Canadian too, to stretch a point), and these scary guys who can kill with a paper-clip (with even conceptualizing a paper-clip) walk by (the spookiest ones  in civvies), and what they see perched on every bookshelf  is a plush menagerie -- mostly penguins, but other friends as well:  an Army hamster who sings “Caissons” when you press his paw, in a hamster voice; Bob the Grunting Hedgehog (squeeze him and see); and various silent animals (they could speak if they so desired, but they have taken Trappist vows) -- microscopic teddy-bears; Miss Mice.   I don’t ask for them, they just materialize.  (You and I were born in this same way.)
But the point I wish to make here, before a worldwide audience of mostly astronauts and research scientists and professor-types, is that this apparent furry confusion is actually intellectually structured -- the zoösphere is a noösphere.  (Say, that’s rather good.  Reckon I’ll copyright that.   ©2011 Dr. J Worldwide Universal Enterprises.)

Now, some of you -- well, you yourselves are too young, the time is not ripe:  but some of your grandchildren may wish to distinguish themselves in the burgeoning field of Justice Studies ®:  and for the sake of such of these, why not offer this handy cheat-sheet, the key to the symbolism of all the animals on this site.  I mean, I could stuff it in a time-capsule  and bury it by the old oak, but this is simpler

And so -- Time for the March of the Animals !



(1)  Ducks

These, as I conceive them -- and as I actually hear them quacking -- are like the choirs of angels, who spend their being in continuous joyous praise of the Lord.  St. Francis drops by to preach to them from time to time;  they are in ecstasy.


Much more complex.  These don’t need to be preached to -- they have already received their Word, though we know not what that Word is.  The situation is precisely comparable to that of the Men and the Jinn -- parallel creations, seldom interacting, each the recipient of Revelation, which  in each case  some accept and some reject.


These lie more distant from any theology.  They are clueless, humbly doing their best (as do we all).  They are not consciously aware of their Maker, in any focussed sense;  their state of mind is comparable to that masterfully portrayed by Hugh Lofting in Doctor Dolittle and the Secret Lake (1948), where an antediluvian turtle tells the story of Noah’s Ark. 
(Bibliophilic footnote:  The original hardcover volume is difficult to acquire.  I ordered it several times from various used-booksellers, only to receive the wrong title every time but one.  Conceivably I own the last extant copy on Earth.  And I would not part with it at any price.  … --- … -- Well, hey, okay, but bidding begins at a million.  We accept payment in Swiss francs or in bullion.)

(4) Kittehs.

These already have their own World, even their own Scripture, to which we would not presume to add.

(5) Doggehs.

Kittehs  no like doggehs.

(6) Bunnehs.

Vulnerable, infantile innocence.  Loveable but too lowly for St. Francis to really preach to.  He does bless them, though.

(7) Turtles

I like turtles.


Elephants denote wisdom, epitomized in Ganesha.
Another magnificent elephant-friend is Babar, who embodies every virtue you can imagine.   He is the pachydermal counterpart of Doctor Dolittle -- immensely knowledgeable and capable, yet gentle (and rotund).

These are rather depressed at being known only as the “world’s largest rodent”;  cf. Gregor Samsa.   Their role on this blog is based on that of the sheep in Woody Allen’s “Everything You Always Wanted to Know About Hilbert Space” (not sure if that’s the right title, have to look that one up), only I figured it’d be funnier with capybaras.

(10)  B-b-b-BUGS....


Of the Great Chain of Being, Tillyard wrote:

Its main function was to point morals for the benefit of man.  The ant was a wonderful creation, but the chief thing was that he was there for the sluggard to go to.
-- The Elizabethan World Picture (1942)


(11)  Mr. Mouse

Mice are made by our Creator  to nourish the owls, and to point moral examples for our edification.


[Philological footnote:
Zoögraphy, pronounced zoh-OG-ra-fee.  It means ‘map of the animal landscape’.
Noösphere, pronounced NO-us-feer.  It means 'the mental world as a structured whole, transcending any individual mind'.]

Thursday, November 10, 2011

Bristol Topless Monostich Capybara Illuminati Viagra Conspiracy !!!


In general, the Google ratings for this site, seem  if anything  too generous.   But in the matter of monostichs -- I mean -- you read any good ones lately ???  Us we got tonsGood ones !!  But in the search-returns -- bupkes !!

Thus, in a spirit of fairness, and by no means (deus avertat !) attempting to Game the System -- the Sacred System, of all-powerful Goo-gle -- we merely meekly (Tymoshenko naked) make so humbly bold (Kennedy assassination new revelations) as to mention (Paracelsus Savonarola Nostradamus prediction:  Dow at 18,000) that this site has a    savory    monostich  or two ….

Thursday, September 29, 2011

SENATORS NABBED IN PORN KING’S CAPYBARA LOVE-NEST !!!!



Just kidding.  (They weren’t really Senators, just Congressmen.)

NEW !!

For hot hard-hitting detective fiction, click here:

http://www.linguasacrapublishing.com/justiceexcerptdivorce.html

For dames-a-million, click here:
http://discretionassured.blogspot.com/

For hot curvaceous dames, click here:


[Warning !  Banned in Pakistan !!]

Enjoy !

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Anyhow, you arrived here by mistake.  This here is a math & philosophy site.  We discuss things like:

            Axiomatics.

            Category theory.
            
            The continuum hypothesis.


            History of mathematics.

            Topology, and in particular  The Urysohn Metrization Theorem.

Especially recommended:

            Consilience in mathematics.

If you’re more interested in thrilling yet cerebral detective fiction, check this out:

            http://murphybros.blogspot.com/