Following the failure of our impassioned “Help buy Doctor Justice a yacht” campaign,
and the utter washout of our Winter Fund Drive,
not to mention the rumored $1.2 trillion acquisition
of the site by [rhymes with “Oogle”], scuttled by shadowy Overlords of theUnderworld,
inspired by the latest move from the Washington Post
WDJ has set the publishing world on its ear by announcing a
fabulous and bound-to-be-successful
Online Subscription Model!
With this bargain plan (10% off for seniors; 20% off for juniors) we shall offer a
wide range of services, tailored to your particular needs.
=> For only
$9.99 per month (plus a $12 weekly handling fee), you have complete and unlimited access
to up to 3 (three) posts per year.
=> For a one-time flat fee of $50 (a fittybone), you will
be granted Lifetime Comment Privileges.
Thereafter, posting a comment costs you only five (5, V) dollars per
comment.
=> For an additional
ten dollars (10 $) we will provide a hotlink to the New York Times website,
where you will encounter some genuine journalism and not that lame WaPo stuff.
=> Become a Premium Subscriber for a substantial
but undisclosed fee. (We shall
deal directly with your accountant in re the details.) With this, you have access to screamingly funny essays, outrageously offensive polemics,
profoundly analytical deepthink, and (for a slight additional surcharge) much much more !!
[Payment via bullion or Swiss francs only, please; no Euros, dollars, food stamps, or
pesos.]
~ ~ Fabulous Update ~ ~
The new $ub$cription model is a roaring $ucce$$ !! And as we promised you Quality
Content, here is the latest for
our Premium Subscribers only -- enjoying
a threesome, seXXXsational Sarah Palin /
Susan Rice / Aurélie Delvaulx nude pixxx!!! (If you have not yet taken out your subscription, this
section will appear blank.) --- :
[x]
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