Recently (we shall not say when or where exactly) a certain
individual was put under severe -- indeed crippling -- career sanctions, in
Venue X,
not for anything he (or she) said or did in Venue X,
but for something (s)he opined elsewhere.
In light of all which -- We have no comment; and shall have none, going forward. About that, or about anything else.
And thus the list of taboos, for which the First Amendment
is suspended, grows by one.
Note: It is strictly forbidden even to reveal which
items are on that list.
Note further:
That fact that anything at all is taboo, is itself taboo.
STRENG - VERBOTEN.
Similar taboos occur in Western Europe: although there, the list is different.
Since it is impossible for anyone to learn directly what is on each of those lists (each
individual item must be inferred from occasional news stories containing
surprisingly virulent denunciations of someone who transgressed such a taboo,
such as may occur when an item is relatively new to the list; but these will be lacking for long-term
item, for which no-one has ever dared say anything for years and years), the
foreign traveler is under peril of his livelihood, and even (in Europe, as
regards [redacted]) his liberty (you can literally be imprisoned there for
expressing certain purely historiographic opinions, even in the most detached fashion), should he/she/it
ever (which G*d forbid) give utterance to what, unbeknownst to him/her/it/self,
it is forbidden to speak.
The latest State Department advice to Americans traveling
abroad is: Never - Say - Anything.
Best advice to foreigners considering travel to the U.S.
: Go somewhere else instead.
Additionally, the Justice Department has ruled that foreign
taboos have jurisdiction in the U.S. as well, and that anyone who knowingly or
unknowingly violates one of them may be subject to penalties. Best advice: Nobody ever say anything to anyone about anything at all. If anyone were to speak to you,
pretend to be deaf hearing-impaired
differently
auditorializable.
“Wovon man nicht
sprechen kann,
darüber muß man
schweigen.”
~
As for ourself, the roster of matters we dare even allude to, is shrinking.
The following topics are apparently still open to
opinion; and so, for the time
being, we hereby renounce anything we have ever said about anything (in fact,
we never did say anything, ever,
about anything -- anything you might ever have read here, was posted by some
mischief-maker who hacked into the system), and instead refer you to the
following, still allowable topics -- although, as indicated, we have never
actually said anything to anyone about these things, either, and are ready to
renounce and denounce anything there stated should any item (say, hamsters) somehow fall under some new
taboo:
=> bunnies [not, obviously, of the Pl&yb*y
variety]
=> hamsters [with no
offense intended towards any other species of rodent or Creatures With
Rodenticity who might feel left out]
=> penguins
[This one is dicey, owing to the black/white angle; but for the nonce, the
subject is apparently still permissible. In future, however, we shall be careful to post nothing but
photos of pink-and-blue penguins, or purple-and-orange penguins, and so on
through all the wonderful colors of the all-powerful Rainbow.]
A totally typical penguin in its natural habitat |
Really! Honest Injun Native-American! Lots
of penguins look like this !!
[Update 11 - 11 - 2014: Our stereotypical image above was in no manner of means
intended to offend or demean or denigrate any spheniscids of an alternative
coloration. Read all about it
here:
(We considered including elephants in this list, but
finally concluded that these are too controversial, what with the ivory and
all, and the Third World connections.
We shall endeavor to locate these posts and delete them as soon as time
permits.)
Q: What do you say to whites who might object that, to require
celebration of “the Rainbow” and only the Rainbow, you are discriminating
against whites, since white is not a color of the rainbow?
A: Hahahahahahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahahahaahahahaha.
Tell those crackers they can shove
it.
DISCLAIMER:
NOTHING OPINED ABOVE SHOULD BE TAKEN AS IMPLYING ANYTHING BUT THE
DEEPEST REVERENCE FOR THE SEVERE ACTIONS TAKEN BY THE INQUISITORS OF VENUE X,
AGAINST THAT DESPICABLE UNPERSON WHO SHALL REMAIN NAMELESS, HERE AND FOR ALL
TIME THROUGHOUT HISTORY.
ALL
HAIL THE WISDOM OF COMRADE STALIN !!!
Big Sibling is watching you… and listening to you … and recording everything you say, or think, or dream |
[Update 20 Dec 2013]
Our attorneys have advised us that our series of posts in praise of
hamsters could be regarded as
discriminatory against the unfurry
furless differently dermatologicalized. Until the matter has been resolved
in the courts, pending a decision as to whether any reference whatever to the
creatures must be deleted, posts
will be permitted to remain provided certain offensive language is replaced by something
acceptable to the most thin-skinned dermatologically minimized perennially
aggrieved understandably aggreviated
pressure-group grass-roots organization.
Approved samples:
[Update 21 December 2013] Legal counsel has reviewed the following post, and approved
it for limited general consumption:
Viewing of this material is restricted to those who are not
offended by bunnies.
[Update 22 December 2013]
For a series of hard-hitting, hi-impact essays on the
burning topics of our time,
yet written within the new guidelines of
nooffensetoanyone,
try these on for size!
[Update 15 March 2014]
This morning’s Washington Post informs us of the following surprising
fact:
Irish jokes still fair game
Politicians typically stay away
from ethnic jokes, except if it’s Irish
The post goes on to illustrate with a video of politicians telling
some. That video won’t play
on my machine, owing to various anti-malware protections; and so to make up for it, we offer our
own “edgy”, “taboo-testing”, but still (apparently) allowable joke:
An Irishman, a person of unrecorded
nationality, and an individual from a nation we dare not name, walk into a bar diner organic restaurant
[For more on joke-taboos -- this time in France, try:
http://worldofdrjustice.blogspot.com/2014/01/stop-me-if-youve-heard-this-one.html ]
[Update 20 June 2014] Weiteres zum Thema:
http://www.washingtonpost.com/blogs/erik-wemple/wp/2014/06/20/george-will-to-c-span-on-sexual-assault-backlash-indignation-is-the-default-position-of-certain-people/?hpid=z2
[Update 10 Nov 2015] Yet another reason, never to say anything about anything:
http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/uknews/crime/11986144/Teenager-bottled-by-ex-Countdown-champion-for-giving-his-book-bad-review.html
[Update 19 Dec 2015] Another topic that is highly charged, and festooned with taboos, in a certain country, but which can be rationally discussed here (except in certain Safe Spaces such as campuses):
[Update 10 Nov 2015] Yet another reason, never to say anything about anything:
http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/uknews/crime/11986144/Teenager-bottled-by-ex-Countdown-champion-for-giving-his-book-bad-review.html
[Update 19 Dec 2015] Another topic that is highly charged, and festooned with taboos, in a certain country, but which can be rationally discussed here (except in certain Safe Spaces such as campuses):
A well-balanced, un-nervous article.
I find your coded references to "bunnies" highly offensive!
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